shove these p i l l s down my throat and
t e l l – m e that I’m normal
enough for you when I’m staring at an
empty void, loss of color and focus.
you tell me I can be f i x e d with
medication but, when was I ever
stop trying to fix something that’s complete
you’re p i c k i n g away at what I am
away w h o i tried so hard to become.
you tell me I need theselittlewhite p i l l s
because for once in my life I’m finally
H A P P Y.
you’d rather i be
m e dICATED
and normal, simple, dead
in my eyes
(you want them to be void
of sparkle and hope, grace, compassion)
you think it’d be easier
if i never felt the things rising to the surface
bubbling and causing the sweet upward curl
of my lips.
you wish i was flat, emotionless, broken
you choke me on those pills
tell me it’s helping me to be NORMAL
but all it does is bring the
numbness back and force me
under the perpetual shade of
darkness behind my eyelids.
i’ll never be normal enough for you.
in these lines,
remind me how
them so often
tell me who
my words have
heart on contact
hate – red.
my memories of
them seem less
I could find
labyrinth of dark
d r i f t i n g away
against your chest
your heartb e a t
lures me d ee p e r
into a land of dreams
and happy memories
that only e x i s t when
you’re holding me
and telling me “sleep now my
p r i n c e s s”
in that sweet calm voice while
you run your fingers through my
hair and kiss my forehead
and in my dreams
A flurry of southern snow and on Christmas no less
Seen from a lit window, the first snow flakes during
the famous gift exchange
“It’s snowing!” An excited exclamation
and to the window two sets of feet traveled quickly
the room was full of awe and wonder
coats were drawn,
scarves flung around throats haphazardly
And the snow angels danced, spinning with the crystals
of white and purity and the world feels cleansed
You say, “lay down, I’ll show you something beautiful”
I oblige, and you take the snowy ground next to me,
lace your fingers between mine…
and we make snow angel lovers
You tell me, “I want to make these with you forever”
and I tell you, “that’s how long we’ll wait for another miracle.”
With this red thread she can’t hold on anymore
there’s this wall between them
a wall of pain that they’ll either get over
or break heartstrings trying.
“you can’t reach me anymore”
is what she says when she falls into
through a small hole
the size of her fist
and strategically placed
in her back yard.
He searches because he’s sorry
that she’ll never be able to sleep again
without the sound of his voice
whispering sweet “I love you’s”
and begging her to calm down.
She falls because she doesn’t know
the way back up
or that going back up is even and option.
She knows she’s not Alice,
but the promise of never hurting again
seemed far too good to pass up.
He’s not the white rabbit
but he’s late for a very important date
and he knows he’s too late to reach her.
All he remembers are her last words
the only thing that can carry him home.
Floating in mid-air, round, simple, clear
we’re caught in a bubble, a small little circle
of love, life, and all the simple things
you’re my world and you don’t know it.
It’s so easy to fall in love with you
you’re patient, sweet, full of :heart:
and I miss you when we go into those
two separate ways, headlights facing apart.
I can’t begin to describe how hard it is
to stretch a bubble without breaking